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Kids are temperamental and moody. They behave badly sometimes while at others they may surprise us with exceptionally good behavior. They can do annoying things like yelling, slamming the door, being disobedient, fighting with other children, not eating food etc. As a parent, you are sometimes confused and frustrated when faced with such behavior. You are at your wit’s end and don’t know what to do to correct the situation. Isn’t it? There are many ways of dealing with negative child behavior and correcting it. The most common route taken by parents is to shout at the kids and punish them. But in most cases, this is totally wrong and ineffective approach. Here are a few tips by Helene Goldnadel to improve child’s behavior:

 

1) Bonding with the kids - Children and parents should share a special loving bond. You should not only be a parent but also be a friend to your kids. A healthy, loving relationship is very important for your child’s healthy social development. Your kids need to feel loved. So, make sure you repeatedly show to your kids that you love them a lot.

 

You should convey love through both action and words. When you say to them that you love them a lot, pay attention to your tone of voice and facial expressions. All these are important. Next, you need to confirm whatever you are saying through your actions as well. Take out time for your kids. Play with them, take them out and have fun with them. Even if you are very busy, try to take out time for your family at least on weekends. Your kids should not feel neglected. This can result in the child developing an inferiority complex of some sort. When kids feel and believe that their parents truly love them, they will love and respect you in return. They will listen to you and obey you.

 

2) Ignoring - You don’t have to always react to their negative behavior. If it is not something big or dangerous, you can ignore it at least for the time being. If your kid is normally well behaved, and only occasionally acts in a disagreeable manner, then it is best to ignore it. You might bring up that incident later on when the child is in a happy mood. During such times, you can explain to him in a loving manner that his behavior at that time was not appropriate and he should try to avoid repeating the mistake in future.

 

3) Show by example - Kids learn things by watching their adults. If their parents behave in a bad manner or have unhealthy habits, they are likely to pick up the same. So you have to be responsible and watchful in front of your kids. The best way to teach them good manners is to lead by example.

 

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Research indicates that unprecedented numbers of children are experiencing record high rates of depression, substance abuse and anxiety disorders even with the advantages of a solid education, financial stability and parental involvement. Parents often feel helpless, out of touch or, many times, unaware that there is even a problem. Developing a “healthy sense of self” can give a child the resilience necessary to avoid such pitfalls. A positive sense of one’s self is also critical to the development of a young person’s emotional health. Here are steps discussed by Helene Goldnadel you can take to begin to make a difference

 

1) Expose your children to and let them learn to manage complex challenges. Do not solve problems for them, rather, allows your child to learn from their mistakes. If parents constantly step in and solve problems for their children, they interfere with the development of the child’s ability to self-regulate. This is a key component of learning to handle difficult obstacles and emotions from within rather than turning to more harmful coping mechanisms (i.e., drugs, destructive relationships…). It can be hard to watch your child struggle with a problem or a disappointment but that which is gained from learning to manage such challenges is far greater than what is learned if parents are constantly trying to shield their children. Tolerate their resentment, anger, and disappointment when they do not get what they want. If they ultimately handle it constructively and on their own, let them know you value their effort. Stress to your children the value of internal resources over external as a safety net when they are struggling,

 

2) Encourage motivation to come from within. “My parents will kill me if I don’t get good grades” is an example of a child who may be more motivated by angst than by his or her own internal desire to succeed. This stress can occasionally keep grades up but the resulting anxiety can lead to many other issues. Avoid criticism and rejection. If you need to correct your child, make it informational rather than personal. For example, “I am disappointed in the way you handled that” goes a lot further than “You are such a disappointment.” Let them know you value, in order, their: individuality, effort, grades. Another way to help children develop internal motivation is to allow them time for quiet exploration. It is not only okay but is actually beneficial to do “nothing” once in a while. This is often the time children find their inner compass, a comfortable home base – that sense of knowing what to do in a given situation. Daydreaming, thinking about one’s self and future or just “chilling” are critical processes in self- development. Saying “I need to think it over” is a good sign. Not all play needs to be structured and organized. Games without set rules, and fantasy play are important contributors to a child’s confidence, self reliance, and problem solving abilities. Time to explore without scrutiny and evaluation can help our children become more flexible and creative thinkers.

 

3) Support versus intrusion - understand and appreciate the difference between the two. Support is about the needs of the child. Intrusion is about the needs of the parent. Despite good intentions, intrusion can do more harm than good. Controlling or overly involved parents, (popularly referred to as “helicopter parents”) can leave kids feeling angry or alienated. It is important to show more concern with who our children are rather than how they do. Studies show that two of the biggest risk factors to a child’s emotional well-being are: academic pressure and disconnection from parents! Decrease pressure to excel. High expectations and pressure are two different things. High expectations, support and encouragement have been shown to promote achievement and competency. Pressure typically promotes stress. When love is experienced as conditional on achievement, problems will arise.

 

4) Be in control rather than controlling - Firm limits are essential to healthy development. The majority of child psychologists report a lack of limit setting at home among many of their troubled patients. Parents sometimes avoid setting limits for fear of making their children angry or upset. Regardless of what kids may say, this is not what they want! It is essential that children believe their parents have the ability to impose limits and to prevail if there is a conflict. This enables them to feel safe as they venture forth in the world. It is natural to test and resist limits but without them the resulting feelings of confusion and fear can lead to risky behaviors. Limits are best set however, by being in control vs. controlling. Avoid using psychological control or manipulation (“you did this to me”) or imposing feelings of guilt and shame (“I can’t believe you handled it like that.”) Open a dialogue instead: (“How do you think you could have handled that better?”) Truly listen to what your child feels he or she needs. You don’t have to agree but children at least want to know they are being heard. Modeling your own self control, valuing who your child is, paying attention to their strengths and idiosyncrasies as well as tolerating their disappointment and anger when things don’t go their way will help them not only respect but appreciate the limits you set.

 

5) EAT DINNER TOGETHER! Yes it can be hard but according to adolescent psychiatrist, Madeleine Levine: “Families who eat together five times or more a week have kids who are significantly less likely to use drugs, have higher GPA’s, less depression and fewer suicide attempts than families who eat together two or less times a week.” Finding ways to build emotional closeness like family dinners, family meetings or family outings mean a lot to children even if they don’t admit it.

 

6) Avoid depending on rewards or bribes. Defaulting to materialism when problems arise make meaningful connection with your children difficult. Offering our children nice things does not necessarily contribute to emotional problems. It is a risk factor however, when they believe from our behavior or values that these luxuries are the things that matter most. Avoid teaching that external rewards equal happiness. There is a fine line between thinking material goods will solve problems and thinking drugs or sex will. Children need to learn to change their behavior for themselves not for “stuff.” Money can be a powerful motivator to get a child to do something we want and most parents are guilty of using rewards to some degree. Share enthusiasm with them for things that make you feel good and productive rather than material things. Above all remember that status, money, possessions and achievement while nice, are not factors that lead to a healthy sense of self.

 

Remember to seek help and guidance if things feel overwhelming or if an issue seems too heavy to handle alone. Sometimes our own childhood experiences make it difficult to implement what we know is right or to be the kind of parent we hope to be. With baby steps, fresh perspective and guidance, anything is possible!

 

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Children do not always know how to select an appropriate book that they find interesting. Often the cover of the book or the topic of the book attracts their attention. They check out the book from the classroom, school, or community library without ever opening the book to see if it is going to hold their interest.

 

We can foster a love of reading by helping them choose appropriate books that they find interesting. Begin with a list of possible books or authors. Librarians and teachers are good resources for this. You can also find reading lists online. Helene Goldnadel suggests to not forgetting to take their interests into consideration. Find three to five of the books on the list. Then have the child choose one.

 

Once the book is chosen, open the book to a random page and have the child read it out loud to you. If it is a picture book, have them read a page. If it is a novel, have them read about one hundred words.

 

Use the five finger rule as the child reads. For each mistake, raise a finger. If the child misses five words (five fingers), then the reading level is probably too difficult. Gently point this out and go back to the other books that were originally selected. Repeat the process until an appropriate selection is made.

 

You should also check their comprehension. Many children can read the words without understanding their meaning. If the material of the book is too complex or sophisticated, encourage the child to choose a different book.

 

Reading often increases a child’s knowledge base and vocabulary. Helene Goldnadel observes that by helping the child choose appropriate, interesting books, a parent can help the child develop a lifelong love or reading that can directly impact their success as a student and even their career choice later in life.

 

Encourage children to talk about the books that they read. Read the same book as your child and you will find that you can have some really interesting conversation and make more of an impact on their comprehension of the reading material!

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A child’s interactions with others, his observations, his sharing of ideas with others help him to begin his reasoning skills. Autonomy is being able to select one’s course of actions without respect with those around him/her and his/her views. He/she is able to think for himself/herself. Autonomy is self-regulation. Autonomy is moral reasoning. Expressing ideas, observing adults and older children, and interacting with them help them to develop moral reasoning. Creative play and pretend play help children to act out scenarios, reason, and respond to others’ ideas.

 

Young children show affection and feelings of liking and disliking. Language is important in the development of social feelings. They learn what is acceptable and what is not acceptable. As a child is spoken to, there is an exchange of attitudes and values. This exchange can lead to mutual respect. The child learns the norms of society and how to act in appropriate ways.

 

Also read: Child Discipline – Tips and Important Reminders by Helene Goldnadel

 

According to Jean Piaget, a renowned child psychologist and child cognitive developmentalist, children become aware of rules early. They view rules as fixed, unchangeable and having been pronounced by those in authority, such as parents, teachers, or other significant adults. They have a hard time viewing other children’s accidents as accidents. Young children typically have not constructed concepts of intentionality. Young children between the ages of two and six years do not consider motives in their playmates actions. They are egocentric, believing everyone thinks the way he does and that he cannot see another’s point of view. A child’s thinking from his/her point of view is always logical and makes sense and he/her expects everyone to agree with him/her. As he/she continues to develop, egocentrism slowly fades but is renewed in a different form during cognitive development. Later he/she can empathize and understand, or start to understand his/her peers’ upsets and problems. His/her own experiences can help him/her understand his peers better.

 

Right and wrong can often be played out as children engage in creative play. They play out scenarios during dramatic play as they role play in dress-up costume play. They role play mom and dad in the home center and situations they have witnessed their parents experience. They judge what is right or wrong as they act out heroes and villains. As children engage in creative play, they make judgments. They may ask themselves, “What would the fireman do? Who started this fire? Was that the right thing to do? As a fireman, I need to help save people and put out the fire, so no one gets hurts.” As children play pretend dress-up and act out scenarios, they create dialogue, and improvise props, conversations, and script. They learn from each other, what is proper and what is not, what are the rules and mores associated with the situation they are acting out.

 

Puppet play also provides this same type of moral building education through child’s play. They make up stories and create a presentation for other or just for their own entertainment. As the children are engaged in developing their play or presentation, there will be discussion on what is right and proper, and what are the rules their characters will follow, and how the puppets will carry out their dilemma and problem solve the situation.

 

The development of the scenario help the children learn the mores of society, the rules to the game of life, and helps in the being less egocentric and able to feel and understand others’ points of view. This helps in the building of autonomy and doing the right thing without respect to counter influences around him. The rules of society and his family are reinforced through creative play and autonomy can begin to develop. By the age of six or seven years moral reasoning can be in place and autonomy developed.

 

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Puzzles are one of the oldest pastimes for children, and there is very good reason parents have been purchasing them nonstop for many generations. Besides giving parents quiet time to do housework or just relax, there are many benefits for children who regularly play with puzzles of all varieties. Helene Goldnadel discusses some of them below:

 

Mental Stimulation

Puzzles are a constant source of mental stimulation for children of all ages, even if they are simply reworking the same puzzle over and over again. They have to think through the best strategy for fitting the pieces together, such as doing the edges first and filling in the middle or vice versa. They are also challenged from the first piece to the last as they try to locate specific pieces and match the connecting parts up so they resemble the picture on the box.

 

Even electronic toys and educational games currently on the market can rarely compete with the consistent challenge presented by a simple puzzle.

 

Hand-Eye Coordination

Developing hand-eye coordination is extremely important for younger children, and puzzles are a great way to do it! The reason small children have to use oversized puzzle pieces and try a bit harder to fit them together is because they haven’t yet developed the coordination required to skillfully put together a puzzle with small pieces.

 

Babies start out with wooden peg puzzles with their tiny hands being guided by a parent. With time they are able to match the shapes and do those puzzles on their own, then graduate to oversized floor puzzles and eventually to the small pieces of 500+ piece puzzles. This is a reflection of the gradual development of hand and eye coordination.

 

Reasoning & Problem Solving Skills

Solving a puzzle also demands problem solving and reasoning skills. Children are constantly confronted with small problems that must be solved in order to complete the puzzle successfully. For instance, when it comes down to those last few missing pieces which are all similarly colored, the child must determine which one goes in which spot. This is usually done by process of elimination, trying one piece in each hole until it fits somewhere.

 

With time, children are able to solve these little problems much faster.

 

Creative Interest

Many children also are sparked to creative activities by working puzzles. They enjoy looking at the pictures on the box and of the completed puzzle and will maybe feel led to draw, paint, and color pictures that are similar in nature.

 

Many children latch onto particular types of puzzles, such as a child who loves animals and the child who likes bright red fire engines. While developing all of the above skills, puzzles often open a doorway to creativity as well.

 

Quality Time Together

Finally, puzzles are often a great pastime that families can enjoy together. Sitting over a difficult puzzle parents are able to get their children to open up to them and talk about things they would be more timid about in other situations. This is because their mind is distracted and they are doing an enjoyable activity while chit chatting casually.

 

Obviously, children and parents alike have many reasons to enjoy working puzzles! From developing real life skills for young toddlers to giving older children something relaxing and enjoyable to do on a rainy afternoon, there are obviously many reasons generations of parents have purchased puzzles for their children!

 

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Being fun and creative is not only important for children to do well at school but it is also important for them to have fun when they are at school so they can achieve the best they can when they are in that environment.

 

Below are some simple and fun ways by Helene Goldnadel to encourage creativity in your child at home and you will have fun too!

 

Games - Playing games seems like a simple and easy way to have fun, but it also encourages creativity if you play the right games. Games are a great way to learn as well as have fun! Playing imaginary games and even making up a game together which is personal to you will engage your child so much more than if you just bought a game from a shop which already has the rules on how to play determined.

 

Making up a story - Story time is something children look forward to with their parents right before bed. But rather than reading the same stories over and over why not spend some quality time with your child by making up a story together. Encourage your child to think of what will happen next.

 

Drawing - Rather than having your child write things down, why not encourage drawing? Research has shown that many children remember things and learn more when they draw rather than write because it stays in their mind longer, and it also encourages their creative mind.

 

Arts and Crafts - OK, so I know its messy but why not give your child some finger paints and paper and let them loose to draw and paint whatever they want. It’s a fun way of showing them that the sky is the limit and they can achieve anything if they think themselves capable of it.

Spending time together with your child cutting and sticking, drawing, painting, or making something arty opens up their minds and gives them the opportunity to think of things and scenarios that they may not have come up with otherwise.

 

Music - Encourage singing or playing an instrument and over time your child can make their own songs up and practice new things.

 

Drama and Sport - Getting involved in a drama club or some kind of sporting activity is a great way to be able to be something else and explore creativity and also helps them to think of what they want to do in the future as they also have fun.

 

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Work, school, extracurricular activities; these daily activities that make our lives so busy create difficulties for parents to foster a bond with their children. While your children are out of school for the summer you can easily strengthen family relationships by spending time with one another, listening to each other, and respecting each other’s opinions. Below are the easy things suggested by Helene Goldnadel a parent can do to form stronger bonds with their children:

 

  • Try and eat dinner together with no distractions, such as television or phones. Eating a family meal together not only promotes better eating habits, but also gives family members time to discuss their day and any good or challenging things happening in their life.
  • A great way of having fun while bonding with your family is to create a “Family Night” where the entire family participates in an activity. This can be as easy as a board game night, an evening out at a fun family restaurant, or to go see a movie.
  • Helping a child with their homework not only allows you to spend time together, but enables you to see what they are learning and how they are doing academically. Your support and praise will go a long way in boosting their confidence in school.
  • When planning a family vacation you can ask your children where they want to go and what they want to see or do. By incorporating them in the planning process you make them feel like an integral part of the family.
  • Many children have extracurricular activities like sports or dance. By involving yourself in these activities and praising them on their participation you are helping build their confidence as well as strengthening your bond.
  • Many parents know that reading to your child daily increases their literacy, but it also allows for a time when both parent and child are completely focused on one another and can communicate freely about the book or other subjects.
  • Teaching your children the importance of volunteerism and giving back by volunteering for a local charity or organization can show them the importance of what they have and make them a more socially conscience person.
  • Getting involved in your children’s hobbies, whether it is collecting baseball cards or horseback riding, shows your support of their chosen activity and allows them to feel they can express themselves in any way.
  • By encouraging your children to be active and exercising together you foster healthier habits for both you and your child while you both communicate about the activities you are doing.
  • Childhood, especially the adolescent years, is incredibly hard on the self esteem of many children. By telling a child you love them and giving compliments or positive feedback frequently you can foster their confidence and perception of themselves. By listening and being supportive of their ideas, even if you don’t agree, makes them feel as if they can come to you with their problems and discuss their true feelings.

 

There is nothing better than having a place you can call home, where you feel loved, appreciated and safe. As a parent, having a strong bond with your children creates a feeling of unity and safety. It is important to do all you can to create these family bonds to ensure a happier and healthier family. Following any of the above activities this summer can help assist you and your family in creating a strong life long bond and help foster better parenting skills for you.

 

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There are many people who suffer from one disability or the other, with the only difference being the fact that some of these are more severe while some can be cured. Among one of such problems that can be cured and must be cured is the learning disorder. This disability not only troubles the person who is suffering from it, but also others who are around him.

 

From a very early age, a child suffering from this disorder is given remedial teaching for helping him overcome this. However, as he grows, he learns to identify that he is not normal in all aspects, and sees how he is not faring as well as his peers. This makes him go even deeper into a psychological shell of sorts, and he becomes isolated, always trying to remain away from any kind of interaction, which even further deteriorates his condition.

 

Another typical characteristic of patients having this disability is that they always prefer maintaining relations with those who are experiencing some or the other difficulty in leading a normal lifestyle. This is also because of the fact that things which normal adults can easily do as a part of their routine are extremely difficult for a person suffering from the learning disorder. Further, if he gets into a romantic relationship with a normal person, it would be a very harsh experience for him, since he would not be able to take the emotional fluctuations that are omnipresent in every relationship.

 

Hence, the near and dear ones of a person suffering from this disability need to have a lot of patience and understanding for ensuring that not only does the person continue to lead a fairly stable life today, but also has a substantial chance of recovery in the future. Remember, it’s not only physical disabilities that are painful for the person suffering from them. Mental problems are sometimes even worse than what one can see on the surface. Make sure you do the right thing!

Read also: Helene Goldnadel Advice For Parents for Child Misbehavior

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It is a very commonly known fact that children are naturally curious. There is no avoiding it – if something has caught your child’s attention, he/she’ll keep going at that thing until his/her appetite is satisfied. This curiosity is what drives the learning process of a child. For example, if a one year old accidentally touches a hot cup of coffee, just out of curiosity to know what it is, his mind will promptly register that experience into memory and the next time your child will be wary of cups. This is a natural process of trial-and-error through which children learn.

 

Having your child admitted into early learning centers help them to garner experience and knowledge that equips them to face the world outside when it is time. Ideally, preschools are the place for children up to the age of six – the period when learning capability of humans is at the maximum. Whatever a child learns during this period stays with him lifelong, and may probably get passed down to future generations through parenting. These child care centers help build the children’s focus and concentration capability through interactive learning media. It is necessary to understand here the importance of inculcating the quality of focus in your child. Whatever field of career he may choose in the future, in order to succeed, what he will need is immense focus to be able to keep going on his path.

 

Preschool education promotes individuality and simulates an atmosphere that is healthy to grow in and learn from. Social interaction, personal hygiene, manners and language are just to count a few things your child learns in a preschool. An educational twist in each activity your child does secretly teaches him concepts in math and science that any sensible individual would know for fact. “The Sun rises in the East”- something scientific and factual is what your child learns in preschools. That, and more. Physical education curriculum ensures that your child understands the benefits of exercise and fitness.

 

Preschools are often centered on the philosophy of enabling your child to develop a stream of independent thought process. Achieving this helps the child in decision-making in the future, and even in the present. It is necessary to acknowledge individuality because that is what sets each person apart from the other. Self-learning process is the second thing preschool teachers focus on in the children. Schooling system today requires junior-high and high schoolers to do their own studying and thus the requirement of self-oriented learning is justified.

 

It is said that children learn the most when they are having fun. You must never have come across a preschool with children sitting all hyper-focused in their books and notepads, scribbling away – this is because it is not how children learn. Children need colors, fun, shapes and other tangible things which they can associate their learning with. It is a tool that helps them to grasp concepts better, and retain the lesson in their memories. Preschools are an important step in children’s lives.

 

Helene Goldnadel is a life coach and provides lessons for child development. She is focused on educational training for child actors and models throughout the greater Los Angeles area. Helene runs her performing art institute with a unique commitment to ensure bright, productive careers for her young students.

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When your child struggle to read loudly or write an essay, then keep an eye on him/her. There are more chances for kids to have a learning disability. Well, as you think, all kids show some troubles when they are asked doing their homework or to read/write something. Though children show reluctance in doing something, it won’t be consistent. By closely watching a kid for a few days you can notice that he/she is showing problems only in certain areas. This indicates that the child is having learning disability. Rather than keeping it unnoticed, you should understand the kid and make the necessary steps to help him/her come out of the classroom challenges. Any learning problems that receive early treatment can be cured easily.

 

Today special schools provide early Learning Disability Programs and services for children with a suspected disability, prior to the school-age. This helps the kids to come out of the disability or reduce its impact in the early stage itself. Some of the disabilities for which training programs are conducted in many schools and special health care centers are for autism spectrum disorder, hearing impairment, intellectual impairment, physical impairment, speech-language impairment and vision impairment.

 

Children with learning disability will have difficulty in learning in more than one area. The difficulties may vary in nature, cause, intensity and duration. Not all the kids can be admitted to a single program. Those who can write will have difficulty in reading. Likewise, those who read a lot may face difficulty in hearing the sounds or to write properly. Learning Disability Programs should be designed in such a way that each kid should get training in areas where they are weak.

 

Today schools have a range of Learning Disability Programs to support students with disabilities. Such programs are traditionally provided to those students who are not able to attend normal schools who cannot provide special education programs.

 

Some of the special Learning Disability Programs discussed by Helene Goldnadel are as follows -

 

  • Speech-language specialist - Using specially designed instruction manual the speech therapists teach students how to pronounce sounds, vowels and other alphabets. The instructors also teach how to recognize words and phrases. This kind of speech therapy helps the students to overcome their reading disability.

 

  • Physiotherapists - The students who attend this program will be mostly physically impaired. The physiotherapist asks them to do special exercises. For those who have difficulty in moving legs and hands, the physiotherapy helps a great deal to make the limbs and hands flexible. By doing exercise regularly they can improve their physical stability.

 

  • Occupational therapists - In some schools along with learning disability programs they include a session with Occupational therapists. This session helps students in improving the language disability disorder in a simple and effective way.

 

  • School transition officers - In some schools the transit officers train the kids with language disability disorder. They use specially designed syllabus to teach students how to read and write by converting sound into syllables and words. The instructors also give special classes on vocabulary, sentence structure, composition, and reading comprehension in a similar structured and cumulative manner.

 

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